


a funny thing happened on the way to the ballot box

by kangeiko



Category: Deathless - Catherynne M. Valente, Political RPF - Russian 21st c.
Genre: Crack, Crossover Pairings, Gen, M/M, Political Expediency, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, Yuletide Treat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-24
Updated: 2013-12-24
Packaged: 2018-01-05 20:27:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 253
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1098255
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kangeiko/pseuds/kangeiko
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is what happens when you let your sister matchmake.</p>
            </blockquote>





	a funny thing happened on the way to the ballot box

**Author's Note:**

  * For [JJ_Shinnick](https://archiveofourown.org/users/JJ_Shinnick/gifts).



> I have no explanation. Many thanks to Chimerari for betaing duties.

"Well. Hysterical laughter is not the reaction I was hoping for."

" _You're_ to be my intended? The apple of my eye? The heat in my blood?" Koschei said with considerable dismay once he had the laughter under control. "I confess that when my sister said she had found the perfect match for me, I expected someone more -"

"Female?"

"Attractive."

"I object to that slur. I am extremely attractive. And virile!"

Koschei Bessmertny, the Tsar of Life, chyerti and man and general, pinched the bridge of his nose and tried to look anywhere but at the exposed chest of the balding man in front of him. "Perhaps we should re-think this."

"My advisers have informed me that your kind cannot choose your fates. You're stuck in your patterns, for better or worse."

"That's as may be, but I should have _some_ say in it. I have no objection to cosseting you and beating you with birch branches - I daresay you look like you could use a good whipping - but I am not sure I could trust you enough to give you my army to lead," Koschei said. He regarded the man on the bed thoughtfully. "And if I did - that is, if I were to wed you, cosset you as my beloved, feed you caviar with my fingers and give you my army - why, Vladimir Vladimirovitch, what would you do with it?"

"Oh," said Putin, locating a horse from seemingly nowhere and effortlessly mounting it. "I'm sure I could come up with something."

*

fin


End file.
